"‘Were there unicorns in Eden?’ the boy asked.
‘There were,’ the father said, ‘but God had to kill them to punish man.’ The father explained how, as an added penalty, ‘God commanded Adam and Eve to murder the unicorns themselves and so they wandered the Earth, strangling unicorns as they wept.’
‘How horrible,’ the boy said. ‘How could someone kill a unicorn—even if God told you to?’
‘In the beginning, it was rough on them but they got used to it, making small talk as they strangled. In the end it actually brought them closer together and helped their marriage. Don’t worry. God knows what he’s doing.’"
‘There were,’ the father said, ‘but God had to kill them to punish man.’ The father explained how, as an added penalty, ‘God commanded Adam and Eve to murder the unicorns themselves and so they wandered the Earth, strangling unicorns as they wept.’
‘How horrible,’ the boy said. ‘How could someone kill a unicorn—even if God told you to?’
‘In the beginning, it was rough on them but they got used to it, making small talk as they strangled. In the end it actually brought them closer together and helped their marriage. Don’t worry. God knows what he’s doing.’"
— “Inside the Grey Derby” by Jonathan Goldstein
