To do:
1. Find a way to turn people into outlets. I believe this will solve all my library problems, as I will be able to get all the irritating people out of the library and also put outlets by some of the carrels that should have outlets but don’t.
2. Finish reading this “Speculative List of Jay-Z’s 99 Problems” (thank you, Sarah). Favorite thus far: “Convinced that Lil’ Wayne’s enthusiasm when around is actually a drawn out inside joke/ mockery among Lil’ Wayne and his entourage.” A user named “Boner” agrees with me, so you know it’s legit. Also: “Anonymous identity on formspring.me keeps asking ‘y r u gay’ and variations of that theme, repeatedly, and has been for close to ~four months.”
3. A list of three would be nicer than a list of two, but I can’t figure out a way to word number three that doesn’t just sound like, “huifwarguiewgiuasf it’s finals I have SO MUCH WORK oh my god let’s just freak out about it for a while.” And no one wants to hear about that any more. Because it’s finals. They’re already sick of hearing about it from other people, and also themselves. I know I am. “Shut up, self,” I keep saying.